I Know The Truth Now, I Know Who You Are

I've had a lot of things reaffirmed to me in the last few days. Like why I never trust anyone. Look what happens when I do. I get hurt, and angry, and I want revenge. Badly. And that's never good. You would have thought I wouldn't have been blinded this time, because the two things are so closely related. But I was. It also shows how much people can deceive you. Most of the time without you even knowing it. When they don't care that they hurt you, or don't think what they are doing is wrong? That makes it all the more worse. I mean, you think you can trust some people. This goes to show you that I was right all along. You can't trust anyone.

Why am I angry at myself? I'm angry because I let it happen again. I'm angry because I didn't see. I'm angry because I didn't listen to anyone. I'm angry because I thought it was different this time. I'm angry because I was completely, and utterly wrong. And I'm angry because I can't do anything to fix it. All thanks to that person I thought I could trust. So what am I supposed to do? I can't do anything. Anything I say or do is going to be turned around and twisted to make me look like the bad guy. It already has been. And I can't change that. I can't force people to listen to me. I can't force people to believe me. I tried that with the last situation, and it obviously didn't work. Even THAT was dredged back up and twisted. It really
makes me upset to see the people that I thought were my friends be able to turn on me so easily. But I don't want to play the victim in anything. Because I'm not.

I hadn't planned on writing about this, but I knew if I didn't get it out soon I would have just cracked. Again. And I didn't want to do that this time. There isn't really anyone who doesn't have a biased towards this that I can talk to. Maybe it's better that way. Less rumors start. There's already too many lies floating around. I don't know, maybe this is a situation that needs time. Time didn't do the last one much good. But either way, some people just don't know how to tell truth. It proves I was right. You can't trust anyone.